One morning during breakfast, a woman lovingly turns to her husband and asks, “Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, maybe a little grapefruit juice and a cup of coffee?” She’s cheerful, hoping to start the day off right by preparing him a hearty meal. But he politely declines, saying, “Thanks for asking, but I’m not really hungry right now.” Then, without missing a beat, he adds, “It’s this Viagra—it’s really taken the edge off my appetite.”
She pauses for a second, a little caught off guard, but lets it slide. Maybe it’s just a side effect, she thinks. No big deal. A few hours go by, and it’s time for lunch. Once again, trying to take care of him, she checks in and says, “Would you like something to eat? Maybe a bowl of soup, some of those homemade muffins you love, or a nice cheese sandwich?” She’s clearly putting in effort, offering comfort food and familiar favorites, hoping to tempt his taste buds. But just like before, he shakes his head and says, “Nope. Still not hungry. I’m telling you, it’s the Viagra—it’s completely spoiled my need for food.”
Now she’s getting a little confused. He’s usually a big eater, and now it’s been almost a full day and he hasn’t touched a single bite. But still, she keeps her cool and doesn’t make a fuss. Dinner time rolls around and she’s hopeful this will be the meal that finally gets him to eat something. She pulls out all the stops. “Would you like a juicy ribeye steak, some mashed potatoes, and a slice of that scrumptious apple pie I baked this afternoon? Or maybe you’d prefer a rotisserie chicken or a tasty stir fry with vegetables?” She’s clearly gone out of her way to make dinner appealing. But once again, he gives the same response, calm and casual: “No, it’s got to be the Viagra. I still don’t have any appetite at all.” That’s when she’s had enough.
After spending her entire day offering him delicious meals and getting the same excuse in return, she finally snaps. With a completely deadpan expression, she looks him straight in the eye and says, “Well, would you mind getting off me? I’m bloody starving.” The line hits like a thunderbolt, catching him completely off guard and leaving no doubt about how she feels.
It’s a perfectly delivered punchline, made all the better by the fact that it builds up through the entire day—breakfast, lunch, and dinner—before landing with comedic precision. The joke works so well not just because of the surprise twist at the end, but because it plays on the everyday routines of marriage and the way couples try to care for each other, even when things get a little strange. The repetition of the husband’s excuse becomes funnier each time, especially as the wife grows increasingly frustrated, trying to be patient and understanding while her partner continues to deny meal after meal. Her final line isn’t just funny—it’s a release of all the exasperation she’s been holding in, and it strikes a chord because it’s so relatable. Anyone who’s been in a long-term relationship knows how it feels to try and do something nice for their partner, only to be brushed off again and again. And when that kindness finally wears thin, the truth comes out—blunt, honest, and hilarious. It’s the kind of joke that gets funnier the more you think about it, because it’s rooted in real life and built around timing, personality, and the little battles of married life. At the end of the day, it’s a reminder that love, patience, and laughter go hand in hand—and sometimes, the best comedy comes from the kitchen.
